ARIES WOMAN VIRGO MaN
He was so much the humblest of them, indeed
he was the only humble one, that Wendy was
specially gentle with him.
When anyone describes an Aries girl as pushy, bossy, emotional, impulsive, impractical, and impossibly immature, the Virgo man who has loved her will nearly always disagree. He didn't ?nd her to be any of those things. To him, she was a lot of wornan—perhaps too much woman for him to handle--but he remembers her as direct and honest, fresh and innocent. “She was generous with her time and money,” he'll say. “She shared my idealism about love, taught me many things, and treated me gently and kindly. She may have been a little hurt or jealous occasionally, but she never created any really violent scenes. She was always willing to talk it over with me—to listen to reason. And when we made up after a minor quarrel, she made me believe in happiness all over again, like the very ?rst time. She was gentle, affectionate-and eternally young. "
When he ?nishes that nostalgic speech, his companion will probably ask, “Are you sure she was an Aries ?” Yes, she was an Aries, ruled by Mars, the planet of war and aggressive action. But an Aries woman surprisingly often will show her softer side, her hidden femininity, and her deep latent capacity for unsel?sh love to a Virgo, When she ?nds a man who's kind and considerate, a man who admires her courage and her bright mind, who seldom competes with her, who teaches her tenderly, sympathizes with her faults, and has faith in her dreams-she trusts him with her whole heart. Her hidden Aries insecurities and secret The typical Aries man or woman isn't looking for reasonable discussions o cool, sensible Virgo remarks about right and wrong, what's proper and practical, and what is not. Rams respond beautifully to generosity of spirit in
others-—and quite unpleasantly to stuf?ness or criticism Aries will often rebel and struggle for identity in a close association with a Virgo because he (or she) considers calm, rational talks a cold substitution for affectionate warmth, friendliness, and an open-hearted manner. Yet, when there's a favorable aspect between the Sun and Moon in the charts, Aries and Virgo can grace one another with many mutual blessings. In an Aries~Virgo association where there is such a harmonious Luminary in?uence, the Ram may surprise himself (or herself) by following Virgo’; quiet example and paying serious attention to Virgo’s always well-meant and helpful advice. “And the Virgins will surprise themselves too, by allowing the Rams to coax them into losing many of their inhibitions and dropping a few layers of their usually sedate behavior. All it really takes for this combination to blend smoothly is for each person to spend more time concentrating on the virtues of the other, rather than dwelling on the differences The clerk in the supermarket who frowns at the cash register and crankily scolds you for not taking your place in line is probably a Virgo. But the softly smiling, mild-mannered, and bright clerk who courteously answers your questions about where the soybean patties are kept and when the fresh melons will be available, and cheerfully helps you pick up the things that
spilled from your cart is probably also a Virgo. _ The customer who aggressively demands to be waited on immediately in a store, than leaves all the clothes hanging on a peg in the dressing room, after
trying them on impatiently and deciding they all look dreadful — is probably an Aries. But the friendly, trusting person who will loan a stranded, out-of- town stranger ten dollars without even asking why it's needed is probably also an Aries. The thing of which Virgo is seldom aware is that Aries senses unerringly
whether the Virgin's concern over his or her welfare stems from genuine devotion, affection, and friendliness—or merely from a dutiful obligation. And when it stems from the latter, the Ram would just as soon try to manage alone as to accept help from someone whose true sympathy and heart isn't involved in the offer, however much he (or she) may need Virgo’s assistance and advice. As far apart as they seem to be at ?rst glance, however, Aries and Virgo can stumble upon some happy surprises when they hike along together and take care to avoid the thistles, brambles, and thorns of disagreement In the Ram, the Virgin can find someone really worthy of helping toward achieve- ment, someone who will generously shower Virgo with a warmly enthusiastic and touching gratitude in return, someone who may even be able to unlock
fears of inadequacy melt away, and with them, the need to assert herself forcefully, in the mistaken belief that to conquer is to win—-in love, as in war. The necessity for combat disappears when the total love she seeks so desperately is given to her as a gift, purely and completely, as Virgo love is always given, with no strings attached. ~ Then why didn't it last? Virgo’s instinctivefear of matrimony. Since the Aries woman is unable to see patience as a virtue and expects all her wishes to come true instantly, the second she says “abracadabra," she may lose heart (perhaps too soon), run away in tears, and eventually convince herself it was only a lovely friendship. Strangely enough, that's just what a broken love affair between these two frequently becomes after the scars have healed. Thanks to Virgo’s inbred courtesy and gallantry, there are fewer
bitter memories than those which usually linger after a shattered romance between other Sun Signs.
Still, sometimes love does last forever between Aries and Virgo, and when it does, Life can be very beautiful. There will be a few shadows scattered throughout the sunlight, however, and they’ll have to be faced realistically, not emotionally. He's willing to face anything realistically, without self-deception, but she may need some help. (In fact, she may need a lot of help.) But if she should succeed, she deserves more credit than he does A Virgo man finds it easy to analyze a situation, spot the flaws, reach a compromise, and clear away the confusion. He really doesn’t deserve much praise for doing what is so instinctive, what comes so naturally to him. The Aries girl's natural reaction to a problem is to ?rst slam it with a hammer, then butt against it with those Ram horns, hoping to demolish it. If that doesn't work, she’s ready to sit down and discuss the pros and cons of it, but the pros may be all on her side— the cons on his. Therefore, if she can leam to face a misunderstanding with a cool temper and a rational mind, she deserves the kind of appreciation reserved for those who accomplish the nearly impossible. All those memories of the girl Ram that the Virgo man we discussed before still retains in his neat mind were formed when their love was new. If
the affair had lasted longer or developed into marriage, she may have seemed to him a tri?e less like an angel. He might also have seemed to her a few inches shorter than a saint. Most of the squabbles between Aries and Virgo will blow hot and cold over his urge to criticize her. If he's truly analytical, he'll soon realize that, with her, he's safer when the wind blows hot than when it blows cold. As I've counseled repeatedly, there’s more to fear from Aries ice than from Aries fire. The latter soon burns itself out. The former can shock the astrological novice, when the Aries woman stops crying “wolf” and cries “good-bye.” Once she’s gone she’s not likely to look over her shoulder to yesterday. The freedom of today may be far more exciting to her than the fast-fading recollection of past heartache. It has been said that Rams never learn from burning themselves on a hot stove. They're always ready to touch it again. Perhaps. But not necessarily the same stove. That's worth remembering. Back to the criticism. True, he has secret ways of convincing her that his criticisms don’t mean she isn’t loved. But loved or not, she won't be happy when the list of her shortcomings is longer than the list of her talents and virtues. If he wants a tranquil relationship with this woman, he'll learn to appreciate her taste and cleanliness in creating an attractive home, and refrainfrom peeking under the sink to see if she's polished the drain on the garbage disposal—or poking into the closet to see if she’s scrubbed the shelves. She probably hasn’t. Someone else can do all that. Like him. Ora maid. She could also have a habit of spend now — pay later— which may bring on periodic spells of Virgo nervousness. Pouting in the corner, nagging, or hiding the credit cards won’t work with Aries. The best solution is to let her get a job and squander her own money. The combination of Aries and Virgo is a 6-8 Sun Sign Pattern. Among other things, this means that devotion, service, and working together will always be part of their relationship. It also means something which may come as a surprise to those who don't understand astrology—a strangely
compelling sexual attraction. She represents sexual mystery to him. He represents to her the kind of sexual relationship she can trust. Somehow, despite the basic differences in their natures, these two may enjoy a rare compatibility of physical desire and expression. Perhaps it’s born of the essential innocence andpurity of intent the symbolic Infant and the symbolic Virgin bring, in an esoteric sense, to their lovemaking. Or it may be their mutual belief that sexual union is the ultimate blending of a man and woman's deepest yearnings, bringing their bodies, minds, and souls together in a singing unison of purpose and mutual tenderness. It could be this woman's directness, the simplicity of her approach to intimacy, that appeals to the Virgo man's innate honesty~—or his unsel?sh consideration of her needs that touches her so tenderly—and the fact that his latent passion can be aroused only with someone who joins him in the desire to raise physical love to a higher level than a casual erotic encounter or a brief pleasure. Whatever the reason, the sexual relationship between them is usually a strong force, often resulting in the kind of emotional peace and physical fulfillment that makes it easier for them to tolerate the differences and tensions in other areas of their togetherness. With Aries and Virgo, sex is a renewal of hope and rededication to each other. In most Aries-Virgo unions, the Virgo man will feel that the Aries female is all the woman he’ll ever want or need. The enthusiasm of her spontaneous passion nearly always deepens his basic earthy instincts. But she may sometimes feel that he’s not spontaneous or involved enough in passion, and she may lie awake beside him on more than one night, wondering to herself if this is all there is to love. Somehow, she hoped it would be more like her daydrearns, more stormy an wild and abandoned. She adores his gentleness and consideration, but she may wish occasionally he'd make her feel really truly conquered and overpowered——like Heathcliffe and Cathy on the moors. The girl Ram must comprehend that the Virgo man she loves is frequently driven, by the.combined forces of his foster ruler Mercury and his true, as yet undiscovered, ruling planet Vulcan, to commit himself to the mental gymnastics of the moment—and pursue a thought to its conclusion. When she accuses him of neglecting her at these times, he won't understand. His busy mind has been busy meditating on amoebas, splitting and popping into the air as they reproduce themselves. At a time like that, to be pulled
back to the reality of man-woman love can annoy him. She'll resent his detachment, and her instinctive urge to employ the fiery Mars method of demanding that he pay attention to her can create some unpleasant scenes between them. He’ll_ intensely dislike being boxed in by her insistence on direct answers. Especially when he’s immersed in one of his frequent spells of deep-blue depression and futility. At these times, the only way to handle him is to pretend she doesn't even notice his gloom and sadness. She should make a conscious effort to remain cheerful herself, totally curb her own sensitivity to neglect —and concentrate all her concern and sympathy toward him, not herself. She should suggest happy things for the two of them to do and talk about positive plans for the future. But quietly and sparingly-—not in a running streak of conversa- tion. which will only drive him deeper into mental seclusion. He doesn't need chattering when he’s worried and won't tell her what it is that’s troubling him He needs to know she’s there, that's all that she's somewhere near, singing or humming con?dently going about her business in the back-
ground. lt gives him a feeling of security. Even if he turns a deaf ear toward her suggestions to go somewhere and refuses to budge under her gentle urging to change the scene, he'll gradually come around if she doesn't press him. Once is enough for any suggestion. If he doesn’t pick up on it wait for a while. The one thing he doesn't need during these Virgo worry sessions is the third degree or the added burden of seeing the woman he loves in tears because his silence and detachment have caused her to feel neglected, and therefore sorry for herself. Self-pity is the very worst thing the girl Ram can allow herself to indulge in when her
Virgo man has temporarily retreated from her, mentally and emotionally. Patience, gentleness, tenderness, and just being there if he should need her these are the ingredients of the subtle alchemy guaranteed to bring
the twinkling stars back to shine again in his clear. calm Virgo eyes. She should stop ?nding fault with him(Aries is quick to imitate, and may pick up the Virgo critical syndrome after a time) and instead count her blessings. This man will seldom interfere with her freedom by imposing unnecessary restraints and retrictions on her activities. (This is wise of him, because she'd do her own thing anyway, through sheer resentment at being told how to behave, where to go, and what time to return.) But there's no denying that the sometimes sharp and satirical words of the Virgo male can deeply wound this woman in the sensitive area of her self-con?dence. Also. he may not be as demonstrative as she'd like him to be—not in relation to their sexual intimacy, but in their day-to-day communication and contact
Demonstrative affection does not ?ow easily with Virgo and may have to be deliberately cultivated if he wants to lceep her, because the tangible expressions of devotion (the small touching things, such as bear hugs, a kiss on the cheek, a meaningful wink across the room, or an unexpected tight handclasp) are a deep-seated needwithin her. If these constant reassurances of love are missing from their relationship, her belligerence and de?ance will grow in direct proportion to the degree of her emotional starvation. The Aries girl is gregarious, affectionate, and demonstrative It hurts and worries her when the man she loves makes it clear he'd rather be busv doing other things without her now and then. But he needs many more moments alone than most other men, for without them, his Virgo crankiness, nervousness, and irritability can increase. Although it won't be easy for the girl Ramgto really understand her Virgo man's frequent need for privacy and solitude, she can comfort herself with the thought that this man is far less likely than any other Sun Sign to hurt her by ?irting with another wom when he's not with her. Like Aries, Virgo usually falls in lavefor keeps. Yes, I know love that lasts forever is rare enough to be a miracle. ‘But if you expect a miracle, you'll ?nd it . .. every time.
THE END
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